226th entry:


i just don't understand why can there be people that are so insensitive to other's feelings? i don't see why people can be so sacarstic and unfeeling? why can there be people enjoying backmouthing people so much?

yes, i may be one of them. i know the fact. at least i knew. i am not like those bitches and butches out there who don't know about this fact and continue to hurt other people's feeling. do they enjoy the process? i think they do. they enjoy themselves at the expense of other people's feelings.

this feeling is terrible. like wth. well, perhaps this is life. this is a world full of ugliness. i knew it since i was sec2. i could have chosen a path that ends all this stupid shit. but no, i chose the "supposedly" the right way. i want to get out of this emss. but it looks like i can only wait till the end of the ten months. i will prolly never ever go back to see people whom i utterly look down on; not because of anything else, but this side of their character. they can go ahead, saying bad things about me and other people. i don't care. i'll live my life in my own way, whereby i am the total ruler of my life; where i am the queen of my world; where there's no such ugliness present.


when i hate you, i really do.-